Archive for September, 2014

“How much for a contorting midget?” And Other Inquiries

I’d like to say we help dreams come true. Heck, our motto is “Dare to Imagine..” Bringing an exciting vision together is definitely part of what makes this job fun and 99 percent of the people we actually work with are really great clients.

Let’s face it though, circus attracts some serious crazy. And we get quite a few amazing emails and requests. ¬†Sometimes, I think what I do in reality is stomp on dreams, smack people in the head with a hard dose of reality, and then either cry or laugh or both simultaneously. The acts we perform are definitely on the extreme ends of what is physically possible for humans to do. Therefore, some people think we can defy gravity, walk on water, or live on air. ¬†For those curious about what it’s like to run circus events, and/or for those that also do events and just feel the need for a little comedic camaraderie, we made a list of the types of inquiries we get (which is honestly not far off from some actual inquiries we’ve gotten). Enjoy.

“I need three fire performers, two giants, and a midget that can contort. How much is that?”

“What can your performers do in saris?”

“How much for a show?” (No other details like city or date or what they might like provided)

“Our ceiling is 7 feet tall but we’d like a doubles aerial act.” (Rug burn..)

“What can I get for $150?” (A nice pair of shoes)

“The acrobats will perform in skin tight non-stretch skinny jeans and body paint.”(So you want to suspend fashion models)

“We’d like only females and need the acrobats to stay and serve the gentlemen guests.”

“We need acrobats for a custom routine on a giant Mercedes hood ornament in Singapore the day after tomorrow. Can you please send all the CV’s and pictures of every acrobat so we can approve them. Please send them by this afternoon.”

“We’d like aerial bartenders who can serve for three hours straight.” (We aren’t bats)

“We don’t have a ladder or anything, can you just stand on each other’s shoulders to rig?” (That’s another act)

“We’d like the acrobats to perch on the walls then jump onto the tables as people walk in to the space.” (I don’t know if Spidey is available)

“We’d like the performers to drop from the ceiling and land two feet above the audience’s heads.” (You go get the insurance to cover that)

“Here is a link of what we’d like.” (a link to Cirque du Soleil’s “O”)

“We’d like 15 acrobats for an event in San Diego. We have no money, but it’s great exposure for a great charity.”

“We’d like three acrobats for an hour and a half show.”

“Our theme is Marie Antoinette meets Ghost Busters meets Urban Grunge, can you send us pictures of your costumes in that style?”

“We’d like to attend every rehearsal leading up to the event, would that be okay?” (No)

“Slight change. It was going to be in my grandmother’s backyard w a freestanding rig but now it’s going to be at Madison Square Garden. I’m assuming I can just pencil that into the contract and initial it?”

“We’d like an acrobat to flip down the center of the dining table to start. Of course it will be before the appetizer is served.” (phew, you had me worried)

“Can she perform to ‘Wind Beneath my Wings’?”

“Can you fly the bar mitzvah boy in and have him land on the top of an acrobat pyramid?” (No)

“We’d like 24 acrobats for a six hour show that will really make people go ‘wow’.”(wow)

“Can the acrobat just jump off the trapeze to the floor at the end of their act?”

There you have it! Please feel free to leave any silly typical ones I may have left out or the craziest one you’ve gotten.

written by Angela Attia